‘’Jongin?’’
It gives an odd feeling to come back from the previous trance, of when he sang and he felt like he was alone but at the same time comforted, swept in an embrace, well-knowing that Jongin sat somewhere else but heard this.
‘’Jongin?’’ he tries again, voice soft.
‘’Yeah-’’ Jongin bids in suddenly, clearing his throat. ‘’Yes?’’
Kyungsoo can hear him gulp.
‘’Was it okay?’’ Kyungsoo asks though, not able to hold the twinge in his voice out or how it turns into a whisper.
‘’Hyung,’’ Jongin says, ‘’it was beautiful.’’
Kyungsoo’s toes curl, and he muffles an upcoming noise into one of his kneecaps.
‘’You’re beautiful.’’
‘’I mean-’’ Jongin makes a startled laugh, ‘’your voice was beautiful. You can definitely do a cover of it and put it up. I’ll promote it and all. I mean it.’’
It didn’t matter before that other people were to hear it or not.
It does a bit right now, because maybe Kyungsoo can get to show his passion too, with a push from the source of his inspiration himself.
‘’Okay,’’ he says.
‘’Okay?’’
‘’I’ll - I mean I’ll put it up soon, I think. Okay.’’
‘’Ah.’’ Pause. ‘’Okay,’’ a warm laugh.
There’s a pause again, but it’s not awkward. It’s a little different than the other ones, where Kyungsoo can hear Jongin breathe and Jongin can hear Kyungsoo likewise.
‘’Kyungsoo, I was wondering-’’
There’s a rustle, and then something reminding of an affronted bark from the other line.
‘’Wassup, brother,’’ a foreign voice says.
Some more rustling ensues, followed by voices, panting and a low ‘ouch’, followed by a door slamming and the stranger laughing into the phone, breathy.
There’s a background shout, some thumping and a – ‘’Taemin, give me the phone-’’
‘’Jongin will be back later, alright? We’re going to the arcade now, but I promise you’ll get your lover boy back,’’ he’s playful, and Kyungsoo doesn’t even get to say anything before the phone call ends.
Kyungsoo is left staring at the screen with a flabbergasted expression on his face.
But it’s okay.
Things are kind of okay right now.
D.O: I’M IN HEAVEN I CAN’T BE HERE ANYMORE
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: well apparently u left 4 more thun a week without sayin porper goodbye u fckin noob
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: so did u see that fucken tokyo gholle ep or wat i swear to gid
__________________
He only has to wait a minute or more before he’s got a hundred likes and some comments already, and he holds a hand over his mouth when he sees d.oppaa12 write: ‘i’m so excited to hear d.o oppa sing! love u oppa!! fighting!!’
While there’s another one whose username is d.ofucker that says: ‘fuckin right’
He begrudgingly glares at his YouTube channel that is still uploading the video, though he perks up when the blue icon on the sideline jumps, a skype notification emitting a ping.
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: kyungdong i swear to god did u fuken watch the ghoul tkokyo ep or what
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: i think ive waited lyk 4 mor thun a month idek i deserve better than this
D.O: i watCHED it okay are you happy now
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: ye s hwo was it like
D.O: the manga was better lol
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: …
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: wat…
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: u fukn serius
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: i h8 u so much kyunsu
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: im breakin up with u n im takin the children w/ me
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: junmeyn too
_____________
Church_boy69: What did you do???!
D.O: what
Church_boy69: Yifan is talking about moving out with some kids or something
Church_boy69: Why does he keep acting like we’re all married? I’m so confused
Church_boy69: I don’t want to be the victim of your love quarrel
D.O: u forgot hte kids??
Church_boy69: What kids
D.O: omg juumyeon
Church_boy69: kIDS?
D.O: our kids. have u been sleeping under a rock... go to church myuejnjun
Church_boy69: WHAT KIDS
Church_boy69: Also I’v e told you, I’m a buddhist!!
D.O: nice username tho
D.O: all our faves like that suzuki kid
Church_boy69: His name is Sasuke!
D.O: sazuki right
Church_boy69: Sasuke
D.O: naruto
Curch_boy69: Ok I’m breaking up with the both of you and you can get all the kids IDC goodbye
D.O: junmueon no
D.O: we were so perfect
Church_boy69: YOU GUYS ARE BOTH ABOVE 18 WHEN ARE YOU GONNA ACT LIKE IT
D.O: you know
D.O: peter pan is a terribly inspiring young man
Church_boy69: Bye
D.O: jUNMAN
____________
K_Jongin: Hey Soo!
K_Jongin: Saw your Instagram update. Are you uploading the cover now?
D.O: yeha
D.O: turned cowboy for a sec sorry
D.O: yeah*
K_Jongin: Lol
D.O: oh you know how to use the web acronyms?
K_Jongin: What? You think I don’t know how the internet works?
D.O: c’mon
D.O: we both know you’re a grandpa when it comes to technology
K_Jongin: Omg, Soo
K_Jongin: Okay, you’re right… Maybe
K_Jongin: But I’ve gotten better though
K_Jongin: I know how Tumblr works, etc.
D.O: were you really the one who edited your theme tho
K_Jongin: …
K_Jongin: No, but… I added some of the pictures myself
D.O: proud of you man
K_Jongin: Is this what they call Cyber Bullying
D.O: the nerd bullying a jock
D.O: they could make a new hollywood movie out of this
K_Jongin: Now I’m a Jock?
D.O: well you’re a hot piece of man on the internet i mean i’d have to choose one of the stereotypes
K_Jongin: :)
D.O: STOP
D.O: I DIDN’T MEAN TO
K_Jongin: You think I’m hot, eh?
D.O: no you’re uGLY
K_Jongin: :(
D.O: ok you’re pretty then?
K_Jongin: … :((
D.O: flaMING HOT
K_Jongin: Don’t exaggerate
D.O: medium grilled?
K_Jongin: Where do you even get these wordings from
D.O: it’s a tumblr condition
K_Jongin: Why haven’t I caught it then?
D.O: because you’re a grandpa
K_Jongin: Grandpas can’t breakdance
D.O: thought you did ballet and jazz
K_Jongin: I’m expanding the opportunities
D.O: yeah call me when ur at the hospital with a zigzag spine ok
K_Jongin: You should have some faith in me
K_Jongin: You totally adored me just some months ago
D.O: it’s cause i now know what a true jiggly puppy you are beneath the cool facade yanno
K_Jongin: I’m not a puppy!
D.O: woof
K_Jongin: Kyungsoo
D.O: hehehehe
K_Jongin: You’re so mean
D.O: you’re finally realizing what mistake u committed by befriending me hah??
K_Jongin: No, because you’re mean AND cute.
K_Jongin: So it evens out.
K_Jongin: Because you’re
D.O: stop
K_Jongin: The cutest
D.O: no
K_Jongin: Squishiest
D.O: jongin
K_Jongin: Cupcake
D.O: I’M LEAVING
K_Jongin: That ever lived
D.O: lived?? past tense?? are you planning on killing me?!
K_Jongin: :)
D.O: don’t ‘:)’ me!!
D.O: i’m confiscating your smileys okay
________________
First time was just a test-call, was what Jongin said – to make sure that Kyungsoo wouldn’t freak out if it happened again. Yet they ended up talking for an hour, and Minseok had been ticked off because they were supposed to study, even if his own phone was buzzing with recent messages from his boyfriend, and Yixing had merely said anything but smiled big in the background.
_____________
Jongin ( ｡ ´ ‿ ｀ ♡ )’
There’s a glint in Chanyeol’s eyes, and there’s horror in Kyungsoo’s.
‘’Chanyeol, no.’’
‘’Chanyeol, yes.’’
One greasy thumb presses onto the touch screen and swipes across it, and Chanyeol is bordering the look of a madman when he puts the phone up to his ear.
‘’Hey,’’ he says as the first thing, lowering his voice on purpose so that it sounds deep and almost intimidating.
‘’Chan-’’ he puts a hand on Kyungsoo’s mouth, and doesn’t budge even if Kyungsoo licks the back side and tries to bite it too.
‘’Hey, uh... this is Kyungsoo’s phone, right?’’
‘’Ah,’’ Chanyeol has a somewhat dramatic pause, and he’s breathing a little hard from having wrestled with the other.
‘’It is. I’m Chanyeol, by the way. I just took it for,’’ he adjusts his seat and lets out another little ‘ah’ and clears his throat, ‘‘Kyungsoo, since he’s a little busy at the moment.’’
‘’Busy?’’ there’s a sharp edge in it.
‘’Mm, yeah, maybe you should ask him yourself,’’ Chanyeol removes his hand and presses the phone down to Kyungsoo’s ear, cradling it there.
Kyungsoo is in a lack of air. He gasps into the phone as he hears a familiar ‘’Kyungsoo?’’, eyes widening in alert when Chanyeol in the exact moment amplifies his weight on Kyungsoo’s lower abdomen.
Kyungsoo’s eyes bulge out, a row of air seeping through his teeth too. He lets out a choked sound; a soft ‘’Wait,’’ and a ‘’please,’’ – and even worse, another ‘’ah’’, and an even louder moan - ‘’Chanyeol,’’ when the taller bounces on him and his face is turning red from the strain.
Chanyeol is laughing soundlessly and snatches the phone away, clearing his throat again, on purpose sounding breathy then, ‘’he’ll call you back later, alright?’’
There’s no response from the other line, so Chanyeol ends the conversation.
He rolls off the other, doesn’t make it far before he’s kicked off the bed, though he’s laughing till tears well up in his eyes. ‘’Dude, he totally thinks we’re fu-’’
A pillow flies into his face, smacking him upside down, and Kyungsoo starts beating him with it, even if his glasses are gone and he barely knows where he’s hitting.
‘’Stupid,’’ smack, ‘’poopy,’’ smack, ‘’disgusting,’’ smack, ‘’butthole,’’ he stops the actions to breathe out.
‘’He doesn’t even know I’m gay!’’ his voice heightens some octaves with the last words, and now he slumps down. ‘’Now he thinks I have thing for voyeurism, probably, and- and,’’ he groans into his hands, then takes a hold of Chanyeol’s shirt, rustling the taller’s torso back and forth.
They’re interrupted when the phone buzzes on the bed again, same ringtone from before.
Same caller.
Their eyes meet for a second, and then the rustling ensues, limbs entangling, groaning erupting in the room and a thunk of them falling over each other.
‘’Kyungsoo- Kyungsoo here,’’ Kyungsoo groans into the phone, half-draped over the bed.
‘’So it’s your phone, Kyungsoo?’’
‘’What’s going on?’’ Jongin sounds slightly panicked now, voice louder than before.
‘’It’s not what you think! It’s just because Chanyeoooooo-’’ Kyungsoo’s voice breaks over. Chanyeol has grabbed his ankles and tries to drag him off the bed, and the smaller claws helplessly at the duvet.
‘’Ah, Kyungsoo,’’ Chanyeol is loud in the background – ‘’you’re a wild one, aren’t you?’’ he groans deeply, almost exaggeratedly, and snatches the phone again when Kyungsoo has fallen off the bed.
They momentarily wrestle again, ending up in an awkward tangle of limbs while Chanyeol has won the phone, though he realizes the caller has already hung up.
Silence fills in, aside from their loud panting.
‘’Chanyeol...’’ Kyungsoo’s voice is a low whisper, and his eyes are empty-looking, brows arched.
It’s first now that Chanyeol actually backs off, alarm bells seemingly ringing in his head, and he mutters a ‘’oh shit-’’
_____________
That’s how the next days go by, with Kyungsoo face-planting on most tables and Minseok patting his head and Yixing buying him an extra cup of coffee.
‘’Really, I don’t want to be mean, but if that Kai dude hasn’t noticed your big fat crush months ago, he must be blind,’’ Minseok leans back after having granted Kyungsoo a round of hearty patting.
‘’I’m just confused,’’ Yixing drums his fingers on the edge of the table. ‘’I thought they were dating already?’’
‘’Dating?’’ Kyungsoo perks up, eyes wide as he barks out a fake laugh, ‘’don’t make me… don’t make me…’’ his eyes become glazed and he ends it with a sniff, ‘’laugh,’’ no real effect in the words.
He sighs out. ‘’Jongin is probably as straight as a pole.’’
‘’He gets all the girls, and he-’’ he raises his torso, staring down, ‘’he probably already has someone he likes out of the lot.’’
‘’And me? I always fall for the straight guys,’’ Kyungsoo pouts.
Minseok deadpans on the other side. ‘’Do you realize you were exactly like this when you had a crush on that eyebrow stud from Attack on Titan.’’
Kyungsoo stiffens. ‘’That was way back!’’
‘’A year ago.’’
‘’Past!’’
Yixing laughs and holds an arm around Kyungsoo’s shoulders, ‘’but hey, aren’t you making this into some clichéd high school movie? Let the guy cool down and then talk later on. Nobody likes bursting in on someone ‘having sex’.’’
‘’We weren’t having sex!’’
Yixing tilts his head and smiles. ‘’Anyway, the worst he could do would be that he’d discuss it on the internet and shame you there, like reveal your sexuality and so on.’’
‘’Yixing, please...’’ Minseok deadpans. He closes his eyes and waits for the horror.
Kyungsoo gawks, holding a hand over his throat, ‘’So Kai is going to-’’
‘’Wait, it was just a possibility, I didn’t mean-’’
_________
’You’re not into guys?’’ there’s something softer in his voice this time, voice turning dull.
And Kyungsoo is stupid enough to backpedal and turn it around with 360 degrees.
‘’I like anime.’’
_______
’So… but… I mean…’’
‘’Yeah?’’
‘’No, uh. Never mind, I mean...’’
‘’What is it?’’
‘’It’s just… I thought how it’d be like… to… you know...’’
‘’What?’’
Kyungsoo thinks he might even hear how Jongin is blushing on the other line.
‘’To... kiss you?’’
‘’To kiss me?’’
‘’Yeah.’’
‘’Well, um. I don’t… I don’t know how it’s like. I can’t kiss myself.’’ Good going, moron.
____________
Church_boy69: Ok Kyungsoo I know this is late and all and we’ve broken up, but have you heard about the anime Tokyo Ghoul?
D.O: do you want to die
______________
D.O: yifan my chest is hurting
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: u see ksoo ur finally reaching the age where u becme a fine young woman n shit starts happening w/ ur bod n suddenly there's blood everywher
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: imagine havign anime tiddies
D.O: i hate u and ur big ass hands
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: these hands were made 4 boobies excse u
D.O: the only tiddies u’ll ever get to touch were the ones from when ur mom breastfed u, u gremlin
$wagger_dragon_fanfan: sookyung are we gona fill another divorce paper is this wat it is
______
D.O: junma i fucked up
$JUNM0N3Y$: Yes you did
D.O: gdi
D.O: you don’t even know what im talking abt
D.O: what’s with the new username btw
$JUNM0N3Y$: I chose a new lifestyle after we divorced
$JUNM0N3Y$: Buy happiness
$JUNM0N3Y$: It’s not free apparently
D.O: are you ok
$JUNM0N3Y$: i’VE NEVER BEEN BETR
$JUNM0N3Y$: BETTER*
$JUNM0N3Y$: DON’T I LOOK FINE TO YOU
D.O: ( •_•)
________
‘’No, even better – you know that they write fanfictions about you and Kai, right?’’ Yixing says instead, face half hidden behind his latte as he gives Kyungsoo an inquiring look.
Kyungsoo is tired. Nervous too, but he perks up anyway, scrunching his nose. ‘’Fanfictions? I would’ve noticed.’’
‘’Because you check them regularly, or?’’ Minseok elaborates, and Kyungsoo’s cheeks become hotter than the sun. ‘’No- no… No I used…. I saw some, once,’’ he mutters, voice doing a dumb crack while he looks the other way, and Minseok giggles.
Yixing breaks in – ‘’anyway, have you contacted Jongin then? I can understand why you’ve felt down if you fled from your date without telling him why.’’
‘’It wasn’t a date!’’ Kyungsoo barks, eyes wide. ‘’And no- no I haven’t, because- like- um… because I told him what I felt through the song, right… so… maybe he’d understand, or....’’
Minseok looks like he wants to start a fire.
‘’Moron,’’ he murmurs under his breath and rolls his eyes, but there’s no menace in it and instead he pokes Kyungsoo’s forehead and ruffles his hair. ‘’I think it’d be a good idea if you contacted him now then, even if it’s been weeks. It’s worse to leave him hanging like that. Waiting for a miracle might only result that you end up losing contact altogether,’’ he says, ‘’and in the worst way possible, too.’’
‘’Be honest about your feelings.’’ He tilts his head. ‘’And stop looking down on yourself or seeing yourself as a lesser being,’’ he pokes Kyungsoo’s hand, ‘’because you aren’t, and there are people who are here for you exactly because we love you,’’ he looks at Yixing, ‘’right?’’
‘’Exactly!’’ Yixing assures.
‘’You guys...’’ Kyungsoo’s eyes become a little glazed.
‘’This is like in anime; you know? Friendship speeches and all,’’ he then says, face lighting up.
Minseok groans.
________
’I’m sorry,’’ he confesses instead, voice sincere, a little garbled in the end, and he sniffs when he feels that his eyes begin to sting. ‘’For running out on you and ignoring you for weeks, and not… telling you why.’’
Jongin doesn’t say it’s okay, but he says ‘’I accept your apology,’’ with a gentle murmur, and he’s leaned down so that their foreheads are touching, craning in his neck.
‘’Just don’t,’’ their faces are close, nose tips almost poking into the side of each other’s faces and the top of Kyungsoo’s glasses are bumping into Jongin’s eyebrows, ‘’Just don’t do it again, okay?’’
‘’Okay,’’ Kyungsoo replies, and warmth is tracing down his cheeks, jumping off his chin to stain his collarbones and the start of the apron.
He lets out a soft sob when Jongin cups his cheek with a hand, a calloused thumb rubbing circles there, their faces close.
Jongin swipes the tears away, and Kyungsoo’s nose is running too, but the taller doesn’t seem to be bothered by it as he leans in and presses his lips against Kyungsoo’s in a soft press.
It doesn’t last long, and Kyungsoo murmurs that Jongin must’ve gotten tears and snot on his face now, but Jongin says it doesn’t matter and drags the elder closer, embracing him in a hug.
‘’I was really worried,’’ he whispers against Kyungsoo’s temple, and Kyungsoo sobs again, pressing his face into the crook of Jongin’s throat although his glasses make the skin around his eyes itch in the process.
_____________
But that’s when Kyungsoo realizes what’s just happened, and his other glove slips off, the paper in his hand hitting the ground.
Jongin kissed him.
And Kyungsoo stiffens there, staring down at the ground while warmth tints his cheeks and he feels himself grow hot everywhere. He’s merely two seconds away from doing a pterodactyl screech into his hands.
He keeps his cool though.
Or so he likes to think, but apparently he’s grimacing enough that when Jongin looks up from the ground, he stops, dusts himself off and asks ‘’Hey, you okay, Soo?’’
Kyungsoo jolts, holding a fist in his apron – ‘’yes, yeah, hah, why-’’ he shifts his stance, ‘’why wouldn’t I be?’’
Jongin’s gaze flickers up and down for a second, and there’s a look of suspicion there.
Kyungsoo’s eyes are still a bit red but he’s not crying anymore, though he dries his eyes with the back of his hands again.
‘’I’m just…’’ he grins, shortly.
‘’I guess I’m just happy that you’re here,’’ he murmurs after a while, baring a small smile in honesty, letting out a long sigh. ‘’I’ve missed you.’’
He looks up again.
Jongin stands there, fingers fidgeting with the hem of his shirt, and his face looks blank for a second.
Then he takes a step back.
One forward.
One back again and he runs a hand over the lower part of his face and looks to the side, almost as if he’s coughing into his hand, but he’s quiet and there’s a sizzling sound instead.
He ends up pushing some blond bangs aside, a wide, close-mouthed smile on his face though he shifts between looking down and up as if he doesn’t want to reveal it.
‘’Hyung…,’’ he murmurs, and Kyungsoo nearly stubs his toe on the nearby kitchen counter when Jongin is in front of him again, one of his hands on the counter while his other is on hovering over Kyungsoo’s bicep.
‘’Can I kiss you again?’’ his gaze is almost a bit too intense with how he’s staring Kyungsoo down, eyes flickering from Kyungsoo’s eyes and down to his lips repeatedly, closing in.
‘’Kiss me?’’ Kyungsoo’s voice may or may not die out in a dramatic whisper, but he doesn’t back away.
‘’Yeah,’’ Jongin sounds breathless, nodding, his Adam’s apple moving when he gulps.
‘’Um. Okay. I mean… okay. You can. I mean,’’ one of the elder’s hands subconsciously grabs the edge Jongin’s shirt, tugging lightly. ‘’Please um… please do...’’
He’s not really sure what it is he’s doing.
He’s not sure what’s happening.
He doesn’t know how to kiss.
He’s not sure if Jongin knows either.
With his heart pounding, he shuts his eyes tightly and almost flinches at the slightest noise, and he hears Jongin laugh, though it’s shy.
‘’You don’t have to look so scared…,’’ he murmurs.
_______
‘’You got the golden boy!’’ he says, voice booming.
Kyungsoo and Jongin share a brief moment of panic-stricken eye contact.
_______